So, my white blood cell count was too low to get chemo today. Really disappointed as this throws a hiccup in the whole plan.
I was thinking, "God, this is really inconvenient"...but then I remembered that this WHOLE thing is inconvenient. What's another week in this crazy scenario.
Anyway, the hope is that by this time next week my white blood cell count will be back up to normal (which is around 1500 (not sure what units), today mine was 900). My boss printed off some info for me today; foods and activities to do to boost white blood cells. So I'll try those methods/foods pray that it helps.
Friday, January 22, 2010
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
CHEMO II
This Friday is Chemo II. I am actually excited for it. One more down and done with. If I pass my blood test I will be able to get my treatment. I am praying that my red blood cell count is high enough that I am not anemic. Since the chemo is affecting how my red blood cells are produced, namely making me produce fewer of them, there is a chance I can become anemic. Since anemia is bad, it would mean having to postpone the treatment for another week. I do NOT want to do that. I have been eating lots of protein lately, though I am not 100% sure that will help. All I can do is pray that getting Chemo II this Friday is God's will.
The past few days I have felt almost back to normal. My stomach has settled down and is no longer acidic/burning and I definitely have more energy than in those first few days after Chemo I. I hope this is an indication that I will be ready on Friday for round two.
SINCE CHEMO I...
The past few days I have felt almost back to normal. My stomach has settled down and is no longer acidic/burning and I definitely have more energy than in those first few days after Chemo I. I hope this is an indication that I will be ready on Friday for round two.
SINCE CHEMO I...
Sunday, January 10, 2010
CHEMO-SABI
Today is the second full day since getting chemo on Friday. Thankfully (all praise going to God, of course) I haven't had any of the really nasty side effects of chemo I was dreading. No nausea (tummy a little upset, but not too bad), vomiting, diarrhea, extreme fatigue. NONE of it! Haven't even had to take an anti-nausea med yet. Not one!
I do feel really tired today, though. A little out of sorts and bored as all get out. Thought I'd take this opportunity, before I get deliriously tired, to write about my chemo experience. Here goes:
HOW CHEMO WORKS
There is a room at the doctor's office and in it are six or so Lazy-Boy recliners each with one of those pole things that hold up IV bags. You walk in and pick an open chair, sit down and then you begin asking all the people in the room (who are getting chemo) "what are you in for?". You learn about Deb, fighting breast cancer for a second time (it has spread to other places, but she is responding well to treatment). You learn about Celia who you suspect is from Scotland, and she is - Glasgow to be precise. She had kidney cancer that spread to other places, she is a bit too out of it to explain much more than that. Deb explains that Celia has "chemo brain" - that they all have chemo brain and that soon, once I am hooked up, I will have it, too.
Then, your nurse, a lovely woman named Irene, comes in and gets you prepped for your first chemo treatment. Hopefully, this is your last first treatment. You don't want to ever have to have cancer again - you don't want to be like some of the ladies you will meet later today who went into remission and had it come back.
Irene numbs your chest, where the portacath was put in nine days ago, with some cold compressed air. When you're good and numb, she tells you to breathe deep, and blow the air out hard as she pushes a special needle through your skin and into the portacath. The needle is bent at a right angle and sticks out of your chest a half inch. Irene puts masking tape over it so you don't bump it against your clothes.
You are then hooked up to an drip...a bag of steroids (to combat the side effects of the chemo to come) and anti-nausea meds hangs on the pole to the left of your Lazy-Boy. It drips in for 30 minutes, you feel nothing, just a slight sting where the needle is in your skin. You talk with Deb and Celia, they ask you what you're in for and how you found it. They marvel "You haven't lost your hair, yet!" and you explain that this is your first time. Celia says "Oh, you may not lose it" you explain that it's been guaranteed that you will. She nods and then asks for water - the chemo's making her thirsty.
You feel a headache coming on - it's been 24 hours since your last coffee and you are missing your usual caffeine dose. Your doctor, a beautiful, trim woman of presumable Indian decent named Dr. Saeed talks with you and your mom about the anti-nausea meds she prescribed and that you picked up from the pharmacy just a half hour before you arrived to the office for your chemo. She explains the side effects of the meds and how often to take them. She says you should listen to your body and take them if you need to. You ask her about a special diet and she tells you to avoid high doses of antioxidants because they are good for you, and therefor good for the cancer, they can counteract the chemo. Also, no grapefruit because it speeds the metabolism of not only you, but of the cancer. "What about coffee?" you ask. "If you need to have a cup a day, I'm fine with that." Good. You send your mom to get you a coffee so you can make this headache go away.
While your mom's getting coffee, Irene brings over her tray of meds. The chemo is really beginning now. First up is Adriamycin. It's red and it's in a syringe. Irene pokes the syringe's needle into a tube connected to the portacath. She pushes the red liquid in slowly, you watch it go in until it's gone. You just got your first dose of chemo.
Second up is Bleomycin. A clear liquid that is also "pushed" into the portacath. In about a minute's time, you've received your second chemo med. Third is Vincristine, another clear liquid pushed in. You are feeling nothing strange at this point. No warmth, no sting, but there is a slight chemical taste in your mouth. It wasn't there before.
Last, Irene loads a bag on the pole full of Dacarbazine, your fourth and final chemo med. It drips in slowly while you wait for your mom to get back with the coffee.
While your mom's away, another woman comes in and greets Deb and Celia with a smile. "She done gradumacated" Deb says. This woman has been through with chemo for a year. She, like Deb and a number of other women in the room, had breast cancer. She's been in remission for several months and is coming back to say "Hi" and treat her chemo friends with a box of Dunkin Donuts Munchkins; which you can't refuse. Your mom returns with the coffee, you explain what Irene just did with the chemo meds, you eat some donut holes and sip some of the coffee. Your caffeine headache subsides and you start to feel a little buzzed. It's not the sugar from the munchkins, it's definitely chemo brain.
As the Dacarbazine drips in over 30 minutes you learn more about the women sharing the room with you. Since you got here, six women have come and gone from this room. Deb, the boisterous woman who jokes about pole dancing, Celia, the reserved and sarcastic woman from Glasgow, a wirey artist woman who moved to Arizona in 1941 and grew up in a house on Van Buren and 21st Avenue (she does wood block printing and water coloring), Coco who came with her mother-in-law and who has been suffering from recurring cancers for the past few years, an architect in remission (the one who brought the donut holes). A very interesting bunch of ladies. These are people you will see every other Friday. You pray this is a ministry opportunity. To share your hope with them and the reason for your hope, Jesus Christ.
After the Dacarbazine drip is done, you feel buzzed and are mixing up your words. You probably have a goofy grin on your face, too. Another nurse pulls the needle from your portacath and tapes on a bandage. You have now completed round one of chemotherapy.
POST CHEMO WRAP UP
So, for the past couple days I have been taking it easy. Cleaning my house, resting and eating when I can (advice from Coco - "eat when you can...there will be days you can't!"). I got the internet hooked up at home so I will be able to work from home on the days I feel particularly bad. My hot water heater is broken and, well, that's a whole other issue I don't have the energy to expound upon. Just know that I am grateful my mom is nearby and I can use her shower :)
PRAYER PRIORITIES
1) A prayer of thanks to God for keeping me from getting violently ill on the chemo. I can't imagine how much worse this would be if I was throwing up or nauseous or having to run to the bathroom every minute. THANK YOU LORD!!!!!! I know so many of you prayed that I would have minimal side effects, and it worked.
2) Pray that I don't get sick. My immune system is compromised right now which means I could get sick easily. That would not be a good thing
3) Pray that in two weeks when I go back that when they take my blood that my bloodwork looks good. Some of these meds make me produce less blood cells than I normally do. If my counts are too low, I will have to skip a treatment. Don't want to have to do that.
4) Pray that my hot water heater situation gets straightened out. It's not the water heater that's the issue, it's a wiring issue with my house. This could get time consuming and super expensive. Just pray it's a simple fix, please.
5) Lastly, pray for the women, and all the people I meet, that opportunities to share my faith would arise. That they would ask me personal questions and I would always point back to God.
Thanks to all of you for reading, praying and keeping me company :)
LOVE,
T
I do feel really tired today, though. A little out of sorts and bored as all get out. Thought I'd take this opportunity, before I get deliriously tired, to write about my chemo experience. Here goes:
HOW CHEMO WORKS
There is a room at the doctor's office and in it are six or so Lazy-Boy recliners each with one of those pole things that hold up IV bags. You walk in and pick an open chair, sit down and then you begin asking all the people in the room (who are getting chemo) "what are you in for?". You learn about Deb, fighting breast cancer for a second time (it has spread to other places, but she is responding well to treatment). You learn about Celia who you suspect is from Scotland, and she is - Glasgow to be precise. She had kidney cancer that spread to other places, she is a bit too out of it to explain much more than that. Deb explains that Celia has "chemo brain" - that they all have chemo brain and that soon, once I am hooked up, I will have it, too.
Then, your nurse, a lovely woman named Irene, comes in and gets you prepped for your first chemo treatment. Hopefully, this is your last first treatment. You don't want to ever have to have cancer again - you don't want to be like some of the ladies you will meet later today who went into remission and had it come back.
Irene numbs your chest, where the portacath was put in nine days ago, with some cold compressed air. When you're good and numb, she tells you to breathe deep, and blow the air out hard as she pushes a special needle through your skin and into the portacath. The needle is bent at a right angle and sticks out of your chest a half inch. Irene puts masking tape over it so you don't bump it against your clothes.
You are then hooked up to an drip...a bag of steroids (to combat the side effects of the chemo to come) and anti-nausea meds hangs on the pole to the left of your Lazy-Boy. It drips in for 30 minutes, you feel nothing, just a slight sting where the needle is in your skin. You talk with Deb and Celia, they ask you what you're in for and how you found it. They marvel "You haven't lost your hair, yet!" and you explain that this is your first time. Celia says "Oh, you may not lose it" you explain that it's been guaranteed that you will. She nods and then asks for water - the chemo's making her thirsty.
You feel a headache coming on - it's been 24 hours since your last coffee and you are missing your usual caffeine dose. Your doctor, a beautiful, trim woman of presumable Indian decent named Dr. Saeed talks with you and your mom about the anti-nausea meds she prescribed and that you picked up from the pharmacy just a half hour before you arrived to the office for your chemo. She explains the side effects of the meds and how often to take them. She says you should listen to your body and take them if you need to. You ask her about a special diet and she tells you to avoid high doses of antioxidants because they are good for you, and therefor good for the cancer, they can counteract the chemo. Also, no grapefruit because it speeds the metabolism of not only you, but of the cancer. "What about coffee?" you ask. "If you need to have a cup a day, I'm fine with that." Good. You send your mom to get you a coffee so you can make this headache go away.
While your mom's getting coffee, Irene brings over her tray of meds. The chemo is really beginning now. First up is Adriamycin. It's red and it's in a syringe. Irene pokes the syringe's needle into a tube connected to the portacath. She pushes the red liquid in slowly, you watch it go in until it's gone. You just got your first dose of chemo.
Second up is Bleomycin. A clear liquid that is also "pushed" into the portacath. In about a minute's time, you've received your second chemo med. Third is Vincristine, another clear liquid pushed in. You are feeling nothing strange at this point. No warmth, no sting, but there is a slight chemical taste in your mouth. It wasn't there before.
Last, Irene loads a bag on the pole full of Dacarbazine, your fourth and final chemo med. It drips in slowly while you wait for your mom to get back with the coffee.
While your mom's away, another woman comes in and greets Deb and Celia with a smile. "She done gradumacated" Deb says. This woman has been through with chemo for a year. She, like Deb and a number of other women in the room, had breast cancer. She's been in remission for several months and is coming back to say "Hi" and treat her chemo friends with a box of Dunkin Donuts Munchkins; which you can't refuse. Your mom returns with the coffee, you explain what Irene just did with the chemo meds, you eat some donut holes and sip some of the coffee. Your caffeine headache subsides and you start to feel a little buzzed. It's not the sugar from the munchkins, it's definitely chemo brain.
As the Dacarbazine drips in over 30 minutes you learn more about the women sharing the room with you. Since you got here, six women have come and gone from this room. Deb, the boisterous woman who jokes about pole dancing, Celia, the reserved and sarcastic woman from Glasgow, a wirey artist woman who moved to Arizona in 1941 and grew up in a house on Van Buren and 21st Avenue (she does wood block printing and water coloring), Coco who came with her mother-in-law and who has been suffering from recurring cancers for the past few years, an architect in remission (the one who brought the donut holes). A very interesting bunch of ladies. These are people you will see every other Friday. You pray this is a ministry opportunity. To share your hope with them and the reason for your hope, Jesus Christ.
After the Dacarbazine drip is done, you feel buzzed and are mixing up your words. You probably have a goofy grin on your face, too. Another nurse pulls the needle from your portacath and tapes on a bandage. You have now completed round one of chemotherapy.
POST CHEMO WRAP UP
So, for the past couple days I have been taking it easy. Cleaning my house, resting and eating when I can (advice from Coco - "eat when you can...there will be days you can't!"). I got the internet hooked up at home so I will be able to work from home on the days I feel particularly bad. My hot water heater is broken and, well, that's a whole other issue I don't have the energy to expound upon. Just know that I am grateful my mom is nearby and I can use her shower :)
PRAYER PRIORITIES
1) A prayer of thanks to God for keeping me from getting violently ill on the chemo. I can't imagine how much worse this would be if I was throwing up or nauseous or having to run to the bathroom every minute. THANK YOU LORD!!!!!! I know so many of you prayed that I would have minimal side effects, and it worked.
2) Pray that I don't get sick. My immune system is compromised right now which means I could get sick easily. That would not be a good thing
3) Pray that in two weeks when I go back that when they take my blood that my bloodwork looks good. Some of these meds make me produce less blood cells than I normally do. If my counts are too low, I will have to skip a treatment. Don't want to have to do that.
4) Pray that my hot water heater situation gets straightened out. It's not the water heater that's the issue, it's a wiring issue with my house. This could get time consuming and super expensive. Just pray it's a simple fix, please.
5) Lastly, pray for the women, and all the people I meet, that opportunities to share my faith would arise. That they would ask me personal questions and I would always point back to God.
Thanks to all of you for reading, praying and keeping me company :)
LOVE,
T
Thursday, January 7, 2010
CHEMO-MO
Chemo starts tomorrow and I am not, I repeat, not looking forward to it. That means today, Thursday, is my last normal day for a long time. I really pray that I don't have horrific side effects. Maybe I won't. I hope my worry is for nothing. Not that worrying ever solved anything anyway. Maybe I will just stop that right now.
Yes, in all things, I am supposed to pray. And pray with faith, too, that God can do big things, huge things, the least of which might be to cure my disease and let me not have horrific side effects.
So, my appointment is at 10 am. I have practically no idea what to expect. I know it will take about 2 hours from when I get there to when I leave. I know the needle is a specially shaped right angle needle that is made specifically for my portacath. I know I will sit there hooked up while 4 meds are administered. I know the meds dump directly into my heart and then get pumped throughout my body. After that, well, I am not sure.
Will I immediately vomit in the car? Will I be able to walk up to my bedroom or will I have to sleep on the couch downstairs...with the kittens...and their oodles of fur? Like I said, not looking forward to this.
I need to pray hard tonight, talk to God and ask him some things. Ask him to make me ok with this whole nonsense. I think the surreality of this is fading and by tomorrow at 10 it will all be very much reality. Not that it's not "just cancer." It is still just that. A little overgrowth of cells in my shoulder and chest. And God can fix it. I just don't like how it has to get fixed. Just really not enthused right now. Wishing this was all just not happening.
PRAYER PRIORITIES
1) Pray that my attitude improves - that God replaces my attitude with one of thanksgiving and gratitude for all He's provided for me thus far. That I wouldn't forget all the positives that have and will come from this. That I wouldn't feel sorry for myself or feel lonely. That I would know that He's here for me and he's put all of you near me for a good reason. That I would remember that this is about HIM and not me. So self focused lately and it's not good.
2) Pray that my hot water heater gets fixed tomorrow. The elements are broken on it, my expert assesment anyway. The service guy should be by a few hours after I get home from chemo. My mom will be with me so she can handle him. Thanks, mom!
3) Pray for my mom, too. Now that I mention it, this can't be easy for her either. Pray that she gets good rest and can help me this weekend and that we wouldn't let the circumstances irritate us to the point of complaining or fighting.
4) Pray that I am well enough to come to church on Sunday, too. I don't think I exactly asked for time off teaching the kids at the 6pm service. Oops! :)
Thanks to all of you for your thoughts and prayers. I really appreciate them :)
Trina
Yes, in all things, I am supposed to pray. And pray with faith, too, that God can do big things, huge things, the least of which might be to cure my disease and let me not have horrific side effects.
So, my appointment is at 10 am. I have practically no idea what to expect. I know it will take about 2 hours from when I get there to when I leave. I know the needle is a specially shaped right angle needle that is made specifically for my portacath. I know I will sit there hooked up while 4 meds are administered. I know the meds dump directly into my heart and then get pumped throughout my body. After that, well, I am not sure.
Will I immediately vomit in the car? Will I be able to walk up to my bedroom or will I have to sleep on the couch downstairs...with the kittens...and their oodles of fur? Like I said, not looking forward to this.
I need to pray hard tonight, talk to God and ask him some things. Ask him to make me ok with this whole nonsense. I think the surreality of this is fading and by tomorrow at 10 it will all be very much reality. Not that it's not "just cancer." It is still just that. A little overgrowth of cells in my shoulder and chest. And God can fix it. I just don't like how it has to get fixed. Just really not enthused right now. Wishing this was all just not happening.
PRAYER PRIORITIES
1) Pray that my attitude improves - that God replaces my attitude with one of thanksgiving and gratitude for all He's provided for me thus far. That I wouldn't forget all the positives that have and will come from this. That I wouldn't feel sorry for myself or feel lonely. That I would know that He's here for me and he's put all of you near me for a good reason. That I would remember that this is about HIM and not me. So self focused lately and it's not good.
2) Pray that my hot water heater gets fixed tomorrow. The elements are broken on it, my expert assesment anyway. The service guy should be by a few hours after I get home from chemo. My mom will be with me so she can handle him. Thanks, mom!
3) Pray for my mom, too. Now that I mention it, this can't be easy for her either. Pray that she gets good rest and can help me this weekend and that we wouldn't let the circumstances irritate us to the point of complaining or fighting.
4) Pray that I am well enough to come to church on Sunday, too. I don't think I exactly asked for time off teaching the kids at the 6pm service. Oops! :)
Thanks to all of you for your thoughts and prayers. I really appreciate them :)
Trina
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
17 - MY FAVORITE NUMBER...
So I met with the radiation oncologist this morning for a little consultation. He says after chemo is done, or at least wrapping up, he will radiate me. When I asked how many times he said "17."
17 business days, in a row, of radiation. I paused, thought aloud, "That's a lot of days." Then remembered that 17 is my favorite number. So, I guess that might be a good sign. Superstition aside, we won't really know the number of treatments until the final post-chemo PET Scan is reviewed and we can determine how many treatments are needed.
So that was a very preliminary meeting. My next step with the radiation is to call them when I am nearing the end of chemo and schedule the radiation.
I was warned of some downsides...possible second-occurrence cancer (that would be breast cancer, lung cancer, etc. since I will be radiating the whole upper half of my body) down the road. But I am not too concerned about that. Again, it's just cancer!
I will keep you posted as best I can after I get chemo on Friday.
Pray pray pray pray pray that I don't feel like crapola afterward. There is a chance I won't. Let's all let God know that that's our wish. OK? OK.
Love,
T
17 business days, in a row, of radiation. I paused, thought aloud, "That's a lot of days." Then remembered that 17 is my favorite number. So, I guess that might be a good sign. Superstition aside, we won't really know the number of treatments until the final post-chemo PET Scan is reviewed and we can determine how many treatments are needed.
So that was a very preliminary meeting. My next step with the radiation is to call them when I am nearing the end of chemo and schedule the radiation.
I was warned of some downsides...possible second-occurrence cancer (that would be breast cancer, lung cancer, etc. since I will be radiating the whole upper half of my body) down the road. But I am not too concerned about that. Again, it's just cancer!
I will keep you posted as best I can after I get chemo on Friday.
Pray pray pray pray pray that I don't feel like crapola afterward. There is a chance I won't. Let's all let God know that that's our wish. OK? OK.
Love,
T
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
A BLOG?! SERIOUSLY?
Yeah, amazing what this cancer has done to me! Now I created a blog. Ridiculous I know. For the girl who just now, again because of the cancer, has agreed to get the internet at home, this is quite a step.
It is 2010, I guess. I suppose I could do something remotely related to this century.
Anyway, I started this because too many of you care about me and it's hard to send the Facebook messages since some of you don't participate in that social networking tool. I hope this is easy for you to navigate and all that jazz.
I reposted all the correspondence I have written through Facebook here.
So, onto the news. I'll keep it brief:
Tomorrow...consultation with radiation doctor to see what sort of radiation treatment I might need in conjunction with the chemo. That's at 7:30 tomorrow morning. My only prayer request on that one is that I get there on time :)
Friday...and so it begins. Chemo on Friday. Bleh. Not looking forward to it, but my mom will be there to help. I should also finally get the interweb at my home that day. Pray I am not throwing up when the Cox guy shows up. I wouldn't want to hurt his feelings.
PRAYER PRIORITIES
1) Pray that I am one of the few, blessed people that are not affected too badly by the chemo. It's worth asking God about, if you ask me.
2) Pray that the cancer cells are sufficiently "injured" by the chemo after just one treatment. That would be AWESOME. (also, "injured" is the actual medical term - no joke).
3) Pray that, as always, God gives me a good attitude so that I can reflect his glory for all the people involved in this little fiasco.
That's it for now.
Love you all,
Trina
It is 2010, I guess. I suppose I could do something remotely related to this century.
Anyway, I started this because too many of you care about me and it's hard to send the Facebook messages since some of you don't participate in that social networking tool. I hope this is easy for you to navigate and all that jazz.
I reposted all the correspondence I have written through Facebook here.
So, onto the news. I'll keep it brief:
Tomorrow...consultation with radiation doctor to see what sort of radiation treatment I might need in conjunction with the chemo. That's at 7:30 tomorrow morning. My only prayer request on that one is that I get there on time :)
Friday...and so it begins. Chemo on Friday. Bleh. Not looking forward to it, but my mom will be there to help. I should also finally get the interweb at my home that day. Pray I am not throwing up when the Cox guy shows up. I wouldn't want to hurt his feelings.
PRAYER PRIORITIES
1) Pray that I am one of the few, blessed people that are not affected too badly by the chemo. It's worth asking God about, if you ask me.
2) Pray that the cancer cells are sufficiently "injured" by the chemo after just one treatment. That would be AWESOME. (also, "injured" is the actual medical term - no joke).
3) Pray that, as always, God gives me a good attitude so that I can reflect his glory for all the people involved in this little fiasco.
That's it for now.
Love you all,
Trina
LONG AWAITED UPDATE
--originally posted 12/31/09--
Hello all! I have a few moments in a coffee shop before meeting a friend for lunch in Tempe...so here is the latest Nodular News. I know you have all been waiting eagerly, patiently, with bated breath for the latest. So here you have it:
WEIGHT LOSS - I WISH!
Gained some weight recently...in the form of a "portacath" inserted in my chest wall.
The surgery was just yesterday and I feel fine. Bruised, sore, won't be doing any wrestling any time soon, but fine. Using just ibuprophen for the soreness. Hopefully I will be able to have a sip, or two, of champagne tonight without getting caaahrazy, but I make no guarantees.
Yesterday morning, I also had an ultrasound done on my heart to make sure it's strong and healthy enough for chemo. I sure hope it is, seeing as I have a portacath for chemo presently residing in my chest! :) The results of the ultrasound should come to me today or early next week. I anticipate that all is normal/fine with my heart. And yes, it turns out that I DO have a heart. I know some of you were wondering.
THERAPY TO BEGIN NEXT WEEK
So, next week I go back to work. My bosses have agreed to help me work from home for the days I feel like crap. Turns out there is something called the "interweb" or maybe the "internet" or "net"...anyway, I need to get it at my house so I can particpate in this "work from home" idea. I will use the beginning of next week to get that set up.
On Wednesday the 6th I meet with a radiation doctor to see what the options are for radiation therapy. This would be in addition to chemo, probably toward the end of therapy to "clean up" any lingering cancer cells. I will let you know what I find out.
Then, on Friday the 8th I hope to have my first dose of chemo. Not at all looking forward to it, but it's necessary, so they say. I will need to take the whole day off work and I will need someone to drive me. I have family who can help me, but if for some reason that doesn't pan out, I will be sure to ask one of you to drive me. I know there are lots of people willing and wanting to assist me, so to be fair I will try to rotate helpers so you all get a chance :)
HAIR APPARENT
One last thing. My hair is now purple. I had my friend Priscilla cut it and color it for me. She did a great job on this, the first of a few Phases we have planned. Now's the time to experiment before it all falls out, right? So anyway, if you see it, please compliment me. I have cancer you know!
PRAYERS
Ok, God has shown me that PRAYER WORKS!!!!!! So, let's all pray for these things:
1) That I have minimal side effects (nausea, weakness, fatigue) from the chemo. My doc said some people have minimum reactions. Pray I am one of those people.
2) That internet setup is easy and not too time consuming. I can't afford to waste days off waiting for the internet people to do their job so pray the timing works out well.
3) That my journey touches people and makes them ask about why I have such a good attitude. Pray that opportunities open up for meaningful discussion. Pray that the Spirit gives me the boldness to tell them "I believe in God and Jesus. If Jesus can heal me of my sins and save me from Hell, I have no doubt he will save me from cancer. And even if he doesn't, he's already died once so I don't have to. There is no death for me, just a transition from life here to eternal life in Heaven with him."
That's all the news now. Hopefully I will have a chance to update you all next week.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Trina
Hello all! I have a few moments in a coffee shop before meeting a friend for lunch in Tempe...so here is the latest Nodular News. I know you have all been waiting eagerly, patiently, with bated breath for the latest. So here you have it:
WEIGHT LOSS - I WISH!
Gained some weight recently...in the form of a "portacath" inserted in my chest wall.
The surgery was just yesterday and I feel fine. Bruised, sore, won't be doing any wrestling any time soon, but fine. Using just ibuprophen for the soreness. Hopefully I will be able to have a sip, or two, of champagne tonight without getting caaahrazy, but I make no guarantees.
Yesterday morning, I also had an ultrasound done on my heart to make sure it's strong and healthy enough for chemo. I sure hope it is, seeing as I have a portacath for chemo presently residing in my chest! :) The results of the ultrasound should come to me today or early next week. I anticipate that all is normal/fine with my heart. And yes, it turns out that I DO have a heart. I know some of you were wondering.
THERAPY TO BEGIN NEXT WEEK
So, next week I go back to work. My bosses have agreed to help me work from home for the days I feel like crap. Turns out there is something called the "interweb" or maybe the "internet" or "net"...anyway, I need to get it at my house so I can particpate in this "work from home" idea. I will use the beginning of next week to get that set up.
On Wednesday the 6th I meet with a radiation doctor to see what the options are for radiation therapy. This would be in addition to chemo, probably toward the end of therapy to "clean up" any lingering cancer cells. I will let you know what I find out.
Then, on Friday the 8th I hope to have my first dose of chemo. Not at all looking forward to it, but it's necessary, so they say. I will need to take the whole day off work and I will need someone to drive me. I have family who can help me, but if for some reason that doesn't pan out, I will be sure to ask one of you to drive me. I know there are lots of people willing and wanting to assist me, so to be fair I will try to rotate helpers so you all get a chance :)
HAIR APPARENT
One last thing. My hair is now purple. I had my friend Priscilla cut it and color it for me. She did a great job on this, the first of a few Phases we have planned. Now's the time to experiment before it all falls out, right? So anyway, if you see it, please compliment me. I have cancer you know!
PRAYERS
Ok, God has shown me that PRAYER WORKS!!!!!! So, let's all pray for these things:
1) That I have minimal side effects (nausea, weakness, fatigue) from the chemo. My doc said some people have minimum reactions. Pray I am one of those people.
2) That internet setup is easy and not too time consuming. I can't afford to waste days off waiting for the internet people to do their job so pray the timing works out well.
3) That my journey touches people and makes them ask about why I have such a good attitude. Pray that opportunities open up for meaningful discussion. Pray that the Spirit gives me the boldness to tell them "I believe in God and Jesus. If Jesus can heal me of my sins and save me from Hell, I have no doubt he will save me from cancer. And even if he doesn't, he's already died once so I don't have to. There is no death for me, just a transition from life here to eternal life in Heaven with him."
That's all the news now. Hopefully I will have a chance to update you all next week.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Trina
BALD IS BEAUTIFUL
--originally posted 12/23/09--
That's right...get used to it now! Pretty soon, I will resemble our beloved friend, Paul Artino.
OFF TO A NOT-SO-SUCKY START
The day began with an early morning visit to Dr. Castillo's office - he performed the lymph node biopsy. He wanted to see if the incision needed to be aspirated - sucked clean of any excess fluid. A quick look and he determined aspiration was not necessary. That was great news, since now Alethea and I had time to eat a delicious breakfast at Denny's. I made my own Grand Slam. It was, in word, grand.
MEETING THE ONCOLOGIST
Later today, at 2pm, me and my family (sisters Alethea and Natasha, brother-in-law Adler, mom and dad) met with my oncologist, Dr. Saima Saeed.
From what I can tell, God has given me an awesome doctor...several of them actually. She and I spoke at length about the symptoms I had, the results of my PET scan and the treatment options and side effects. She was very friendly and easy to talk with. She didn't mind my family's incessant questions, and she laughed at our ridiculous jokes. I guess technically I am paying her, but still, she didn't HAVE to laugh...
I learned that the lymphoma is in Stage 2A. "2" means it has moved from being in one spot (which would make it Stage 1) and is in two spots...my supraclavicular area (above the clavical) on the left side and also deeper inside my chest between my lungs and behind my heart, also in lymph nodes that are in that area. "A" means that I have had no symptoms of night sweats or weight loss (dang). While this sucks for my weight loss goals, being in camp "A" is a good camp to be. It means this will be easier to treat :)
HAIR CARE FREE
So, the treatment involves several "cycles" of chemotherapy. One "cycle" equals two "sessions." The sessions happen every other week and involve an hour and a half of chemotherapy. Through a "port" - literally a tube thing implanted in my chest, I will receive strong doses of 4 medications. After two months (two cycles) I'll have another PET scan to see how it's working.
The side effects include, among other things, losing my hair. It's guaranteed the doctor says. So, I will have to get used to that. But, better to have no hair than to have hair and cancer, that's what I always say :)
PRAYER PRIORITIES
Please pray that timelines and schedules work out so that I can start chemo as early as next week. Thanks for all your thoughts and prayers and support.
Gotta dash...I am trying to get out of work!!!!!!!
Trina
That's right...get used to it now! Pretty soon, I will resemble our beloved friend, Paul Artino.
OFF TO A NOT-SO-SUCKY START
The day began with an early morning visit to Dr. Castillo's office - he performed the lymph node biopsy. He wanted to see if the incision needed to be aspirated - sucked clean of any excess fluid. A quick look and he determined aspiration was not necessary. That was great news, since now Alethea and I had time to eat a delicious breakfast at Denny's. I made my own Grand Slam. It was, in word, grand.
MEETING THE ONCOLOGIST
Later today, at 2pm, me and my family (sisters Alethea and Natasha, brother-in-law Adler, mom and dad) met with my oncologist, Dr. Saima Saeed.
From what I can tell, God has given me an awesome doctor...several of them actually. She and I spoke at length about the symptoms I had, the results of my PET scan and the treatment options and side effects. She was very friendly and easy to talk with. She didn't mind my family's incessant questions, and she laughed at our ridiculous jokes. I guess technically I am paying her, but still, she didn't HAVE to laugh...
I learned that the lymphoma is in Stage 2A. "2" means it has moved from being in one spot (which would make it Stage 1) and is in two spots...my supraclavicular area (above the clavical) on the left side and also deeper inside my chest between my lungs and behind my heart, also in lymph nodes that are in that area. "A" means that I have had no symptoms of night sweats or weight loss (dang). While this sucks for my weight loss goals, being in camp "A" is a good camp to be. It means this will be easier to treat :)
HAIR CARE FREE
So, the treatment involves several "cycles" of chemotherapy. One "cycle" equals two "sessions." The sessions happen every other week and involve an hour and a half of chemotherapy. Through a "port" - literally a tube thing implanted in my chest, I will receive strong doses of 4 medications. After two months (two cycles) I'll have another PET scan to see how it's working.
The side effects include, among other things, losing my hair. It's guaranteed the doctor says. So, I will have to get used to that. But, better to have no hair than to have hair and cancer, that's what I always say :)
PRAYER PRIORITIES
Please pray that timelines and schedules work out so that I can start chemo as early as next week. Thanks for all your thoughts and prayers and support.
Gotta dash...I am trying to get out of work!!!!!!!
Trina
PET SCAN RESULTS
--originally posted 12/22/09--
Hi friends and family -
I received GREAT news this morning. The PET scan results are in and it looks like the lymphoma is just hanging out in my shoulder! It has not gotten to any other parts of my body...it's not in my marrow or spleen either.
So...tomorrow I have two appointments scheduled. The first is with the surgeon at 7:30am to see if my incision (from my biopsy) needs to be aspirated (gross...it's to see if there's excess "fluid" in there that needs to be sucked out).
My second appointment tomorrow is at 2:15 to meet with the oncologist. She will hopefully tell me what the next steps are (chemo, radiation or both).
Again, I will keep you all posted.
Thanks for your prayers. I know God has got me through all of this and He just proved it again this morning with the good news from the doctor.
Love,
T
Hi friends and family -
I received GREAT news this morning. The PET scan results are in and it looks like the lymphoma is just hanging out in my shoulder! It has not gotten to any other parts of my body...it's not in my marrow or spleen either.
So...tomorrow I have two appointments scheduled. The first is with the surgeon at 7:30am to see if my incision (from my biopsy) needs to be aspirated (gross...it's to see if there's excess "fluid" in there that needs to be sucked out).
My second appointment tomorrow is at 2:15 to meet with the oncologist. She will hopefully tell me what the next steps are (chemo, radiation or both).
Again, I will keep you all posted.
Thanks for your prayers. I know God has got me through all of this and He just proved it again this morning with the good news from the doctor.
Love,
T
GLOWING, GLOWING, GONE!
--originally posted 12/17/09--
I am done being radioactive so I am back at work and able to write to all of you...
HAIR TODAY, GONE TOMORROW
Yesterday I had my PET scan, which was interesting to say the least. Radioactive isotopes suspended in glucose was the least interesting part...my tech was completely hairless (I will assume as much anyway). When I asked him why (yes, I am the person who would ask someone such a question) I thought the answer was going to be something related to chemotherapy. But no.
Did you know, when a person goes into shock, as in the case of this tech, David, who nine years ago was robbed at gunpoint, the human body can react so as to lose its own hair?! Apparently, this is true. Nine years ago, David was the victim of an armed robbery and was so frightened by the event that he started losing his hair shortly after and eventually lost all of it. I asked if he could be shocked back into growing hair and he said he didn't think so.
SCAN, SIR?
So, I proceeded to have the scan done which was uneventful. Quite boring actually - I was dozing in the machine after a while. When it was all done, I asked to see the scan and David let me.
Now, I am no doctor, no oncologist, not a reader of PET scans by trade. But what I saw, or think I saw, was encouraging. It looked like the "hotspots" (the areas that the radioactive sugar went to) were just these: my brain, my heart, my bladder, and three spots in my left shoulder. The brain and heart are "glucose avid" - they needed that sugar for energy so they absorbed it. My bladder was at work processing the glucose, so it showed up there. The cancer in the affected lymph nodes in my shoulder snatched up that glucose, too - this is the point of the whole PET scan. By my non-expert opinion, and again, I don't have the skills to accurately read a PET scan, it looked like the only area that is affected is my left shoulder.
I could have official results this Friday; definitely by next Wednesday.
PRAYER PRIORITIES
My hopes for this whole thing are shifting more and more away from me and the results for me and more and more toward God and his plan for the people he has put in my life at this point in time. So, I pray for my family, friends, coworkers, doctors and oncologists, for David and the nurses and admins to see me and my family and friends and wonder how I can be so calm having cancer and all. Pray that my reactions would stir questions in their hearts.
Thanks for reading and for your prayers and thoughts. The next edition of The Nodular News will feature updates on the PET scan results.
Trina
I am done being radioactive so I am back at work and able to write to all of you...
HAIR TODAY, GONE TOMORROW
Yesterday I had my PET scan, which was interesting to say the least. Radioactive isotopes suspended in glucose was the least interesting part...my tech was completely hairless (I will assume as much anyway). When I asked him why (yes, I am the person who would ask someone such a question) I thought the answer was going to be something related to chemotherapy. But no.
Did you know, when a person goes into shock, as in the case of this tech, David, who nine years ago was robbed at gunpoint, the human body can react so as to lose its own hair?! Apparently, this is true. Nine years ago, David was the victim of an armed robbery and was so frightened by the event that he started losing his hair shortly after and eventually lost all of it. I asked if he could be shocked back into growing hair and he said he didn't think so.
SCAN, SIR?
So, I proceeded to have the scan done which was uneventful. Quite boring actually - I was dozing in the machine after a while. When it was all done, I asked to see the scan and David let me.
Now, I am no doctor, no oncologist, not a reader of PET scans by trade. But what I saw, or think I saw, was encouraging. It looked like the "hotspots" (the areas that the radioactive sugar went to) were just these: my brain, my heart, my bladder, and three spots in my left shoulder. The brain and heart are "glucose avid" - they needed that sugar for energy so they absorbed it. My bladder was at work processing the glucose, so it showed up there. The cancer in the affected lymph nodes in my shoulder snatched up that glucose, too - this is the point of the whole PET scan. By my non-expert opinion, and again, I don't have the skills to accurately read a PET scan, it looked like the only area that is affected is my left shoulder.
I could have official results this Friday; definitely by next Wednesday.
PRAYER PRIORITIES
My hopes for this whole thing are shifting more and more away from me and the results for me and more and more toward God and his plan for the people he has put in my life at this point in time. So, I pray for my family, friends, coworkers, doctors and oncologists, for David and the nurses and admins to see me and my family and friends and wonder how I can be so calm having cancer and all. Pray that my reactions would stir questions in their hearts.
Thanks for reading and for your prayers and thoughts. The next edition of The Nodular News will feature updates on the PET scan results.
Trina
AN UPDATE
--originally posted 12/15/09--
SCAN YOU DIG IT?
So, friends and family, tomorrow is my PET scan. I am not sure what that stands for, I haven't looked it up (untrue, I did, but I forgot what it meant), but it does NOT mean that I will be bringing my kittens in with me.
No, no. This little procedure is to see where any cancer cells might be hanging about. This will help the oncologist determine how to best approach my treatment.
The test is at 8am and lasts, from start to finish, 1.75 hours (for those of you uncomfortable with decimals, that means 1 hour and 45 minutes).
PRAYER PRIORITIES
My first prayer is that the cancer has not spread very far, if at all. If it hasn't gotten too far, perhaps they can just radiate the heck out of my shoulder and I won't have to do chemo.
My second prayer, is that if it has spread, that it hasn't spread too much.
My third prayer, is that if it has spread too much and I don't have too long to live, that a) I am OK with that, knowing that God is in control and, as always, he will get glory out of this and b) that I can enjoy my last days traveling and blowing whatever savings I have :)
Oh wait, revise. My first prayer is that the God removes the cancer sometime between now and 8am tomorrow. (Pray big or go home, right?)
ALL THIS TO SAY...
Thanks for reading and praying and thinking about me. I really appreciate it very much and I hope in the end this was all a big deal for nothing.
I'll keep you posted. The results may not be available until Wednesday, the 23rd.
Look for the next edition of The Nodular News right here in your Inbox...
Trina
SCAN YOU DIG IT?
So, friends and family, tomorrow is my PET scan. I am not sure what that stands for, I haven't looked it up (untrue, I did, but I forgot what it meant), but it does NOT mean that I will be bringing my kittens in with me.
No, no. This little procedure is to see where any cancer cells might be hanging about. This will help the oncologist determine how to best approach my treatment.
The test is at 8am and lasts, from start to finish, 1.75 hours (for those of you uncomfortable with decimals, that means 1 hour and 45 minutes).
PRAYER PRIORITIES
My first prayer is that the cancer has not spread very far, if at all. If it hasn't gotten too far, perhaps they can just radiate the heck out of my shoulder and I won't have to do chemo.
My second prayer, is that if it has spread, that it hasn't spread too much.
My third prayer, is that if it has spread too much and I don't have too long to live, that a) I am OK with that, knowing that God is in control and, as always, he will get glory out of this and b) that I can enjoy my last days traveling and blowing whatever savings I have :)
Oh wait, revise. My first prayer is that the God removes the cancer sometime between now and 8am tomorrow. (Pray big or go home, right?)
ALL THIS TO SAY...
Thanks for reading and praying and thinking about me. I really appreciate it very much and I hope in the end this was all a big deal for nothing.
I'll keep you posted. The results may not be available until Wednesday, the 23rd.
Look for the next edition of The Nodular News right here in your Inbox...
Trina
THE NODULAR NEWS
--originally posted 12/10/09--
Hello LG -
As some of you know, last Friday, I had a biopsy on some lymph nodes that had gone awry in my shoulder/neck area. The concern was that I had no infection, so no "good" reason for those lymph nodes (which help transport white blood cells to infection sites as well as clear out infections) to be enlarged (which they were).
So that was the reason they needed to biopsy them. This involved a quick surgery this past Friday. Today I went to find out what the results of the testing are.
Turns out, it's Hodgkins Lymphoma. It's a type of cancer, but, treatable and curable. The surgeon said "they're going to cure you."
But, he's just the surgeon, not the oncologist. So the oncology peeps need to do a PET scan (this will show where else the cancer may be in my body) and from there they will decide what type of treatment will get rid of it. The treatment is your standard chemotherapy or radiation (or both).
The surgeon told me that sometimes Hodgkins is isolated to one area (rather than spreading throughout the lymphatic system (which covers your whole body)) so my next prayer for God will be that he has isolated it to my shoulder/neck area. This means they can radiate the crap out of my shoulder and I hopefully won't have to do chemo.
I can't really think too much about treatment until the PET scan is complete and the oncologists have had a chance to put their game plan together.
While this is probably going to be inconvenient and uncomfortable, it's just cancer. People survive it all the time. What's more, God's going to get some great press out of this (aka glory) so that's all that counts. He has given me some great peace with this whole thing. I always struggled with trusting Him completely and now, since there is NOTHING I can do about this I have placed it in His hands. Isn't that nice of Him? To give me something like this so I have no choice but to trust Him. What a Guy. What a great great Guy!
Thanks so much for your prayers and texts and calls and thoughts. I really value our friendship and relationship and am glad to have you all to talk to. If there is anything I need I will be sure to let you know.
I will keep you up-to-date on this whole "situation" as details and news become available.
Love you all :)
Trina
Hello LG -
As some of you know, last Friday, I had a biopsy on some lymph nodes that had gone awry in my shoulder/neck area. The concern was that I had no infection, so no "good" reason for those lymph nodes (which help transport white blood cells to infection sites as well as clear out infections) to be enlarged (which they were).
So that was the reason they needed to biopsy them. This involved a quick surgery this past Friday. Today I went to find out what the results of the testing are.
Turns out, it's Hodgkins Lymphoma. It's a type of cancer, but, treatable and curable. The surgeon said "they're going to cure you."
But, he's just the surgeon, not the oncologist. So the oncology peeps need to do a PET scan (this will show where else the cancer may be in my body) and from there they will decide what type of treatment will get rid of it. The treatment is your standard chemotherapy or radiation (or both).
The surgeon told me that sometimes Hodgkins is isolated to one area (rather than spreading throughout the lymphatic system (which covers your whole body)) so my next prayer for God will be that he has isolated it to my shoulder/neck area. This means they can radiate the crap out of my shoulder and I hopefully won't have to do chemo.
I can't really think too much about treatment until the PET scan is complete and the oncologists have had a chance to put their game plan together.
While this is probably going to be inconvenient and uncomfortable, it's just cancer. People survive it all the time. What's more, God's going to get some great press out of this (aka glory) so that's all that counts. He has given me some great peace with this whole thing. I always struggled with trusting Him completely and now, since there is NOTHING I can do about this I have placed it in His hands. Isn't that nice of Him? To give me something like this so I have no choice but to trust Him. What a Guy. What a great great Guy!
Thanks so much for your prayers and texts and calls and thoughts. I really value our friendship and relationship and am glad to have you all to talk to. If there is anything I need I will be sure to let you know.
I will keep you up-to-date on this whole "situation" as details and news become available.
Love you all :)
Trina
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
